“Not Yet”

March 2, 2010

Today, we had a rather unexpected snow fall.  It started with sleet/ice pellets falling around 9am, which later turned to snow that fell until almost 3pm.  I wanted to fully embrace this “Mesa Moment” in my life because as many of you know, snow is such a rare treat for me.  I wanted to be outside playing in the snow as it fell.  I wanted to not only see it, but hear it and feel it. 

Brady, however, despite his excitement of the snow was not interested in being outside in it today.  He was quite content to stay inside and look at it from the warmth of our home.  The two times I did manage to get him to put his boots on and go out in it, he turned around after two minutes and headed back inside.

I found myself rather agitated with this.  This was a moment that I wanted to experience in my own way, and I wanted to do it now.  My little man was inhibiting this, today, and I felt that I was not fully embracing the moment.  There were even tons of Robins in our backyard enjoying the snow and frolicking around in it.  I wanted to be out there.  Brady,however, in his own way was saying to me, “Not now, mom.  I am not ready.”

Reflecting on this further, though, I am reminded of how relevant of a message this is for me right now.  There are things I desire to do, there are things I feel called to do, there are things I want to experience, and I want to do it all now.  However, perhaps, the time is not right, yet.  Perhaps, I need to be alright with experiencing the present moment from the warmth of my own home and from the warmth of the present moment in my life.  Perhaps, this is the time for me to observe a bit, to learn more, to dream of new possibilities, and to let new insights deepen and firmly take root.  Often God ‘s answers to my prayers are, “Not now.  Not just yet.  The time is not right.”

This doesn’t mean we stop dreaming.  This doesn’t mean we do not fully embrace the moments in front of us.  This just means we have to realize that while God can say, “yes” or “no”.  God’s answer can also be “Not now.”

Is there something in our lives where the answer we are getting from God is “Not now”?
How do we respond when God gives us the answer of “Not now”?
What graces do we seek during  our wait for the “yes” we desire?

Becky is an Ignatian-trained spiritual director, retreat facilitator, and writer. She is the author of the Busy Lives and Restless Souls (March 2017, Loyola Press) and The Inner Chapel (April 2020, Loyola Press). She helps others create space to connect faith and everyday life through facilitating retreats and days of reflection, through writing, and through spiritual direction. With nearly twenty years of ministry experience within the Catholic Church, Becky seeks to help others discover God at work in the every day moments of people’s lives by utilizing St. Ignatius’ Spiritual Exercises and the many gifts that our Catholic faith and Ignatian Spirituality provide.

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