Permanent, Faithful, and Life-Giving

January 4, 2010

Last night, Chris and I were preparing to give a talk on the Sacrament of Marriage on Tuesday night, which led us to watch our wedding video.  I think this is only the second time we have watched it.  We were both struck again by Fr. Charlie’s homily at our wedding.  Fr. Charlie spoke about how Jesus’ love for us is permanent, faithful, and life-giving.  He then spoke to Chris and I about how our love for each other should be the same:  permanent, faithful, and life-giving. 

As Chris and I talked about this last night, we both shared how it is easier to understand how to love each other in a permanent and faithful way.  The harder part to daily discern is how to constantly love each other in a life-giving way.  How do we daily love each other in a way where we are both giving and receiving love with our gifts as individuals and with our gift of being a couple?  How do we foster each others’ gifts?  How do we help strengthen each others’ true selves on a daily basis?  How do we continue to make our marriage a priority along with everything else that life requires? 

Chris and I talked last night about how easy it is to become wrapped up in our own agendas, in developing our own gifts, in only worrying about our accomplishments, and in thinking only about our own well-being.  This thinking happens so quickly sometimes that we forget to think about the impact on the other person.   The Sacrament of Marriage calls us to something else.  It calls us to life-giving love.  We should always be asking:  Does this allow both of us to give and receive love? 

Loving in a life-giving way is how we are all called to love each other, whether in marriage or in friendship or in family relationships.  We are called to love in a way where all involved can both give and receive love.   

Think about the relationships in our lives.   Are we loving in a life-giving way? 

Becky is an Ignatian-trained spiritual director, retreat facilitator, and writer. She is the author of the Busy Lives and Restless Souls (March 2017, Loyola Press) and The Inner Chapel (April 2020, Loyola Press). She helps others create space to connect faith and everyday life through facilitating retreats and days of reflection, through writing, and through spiritual direction. With nearly twenty years of ministry experience within the Catholic Church, Becky seeks to help others discover God at work in the every day moments of people’s lives by utilizing St. Ignatius’ Spiritual Exercises and the many gifts that our Catholic faith and Ignatian Spirituality provide.

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